Rediscovering: Interludes
by AminalLuv
Summary: An accompaniment to Rediscovering Logan Huntzberger. This story will contain missing scenes from other character's POV.
1. The Gazebo

**AN: After I wrote the first chapter of Rediscovering Logan Huntzberger, I realized I needed to get this scene down on paper so that I could better understand Rory when it came time to write her. I also had a few other "deleted" scenes play out in my head that I thought would be fun to write at some point. I thought it would be fun to publish some of these if/when I get around to writing them. Since the Gazebo scene was already basically written, I went ahead and polished up and am offering it to you all as my gift. Enjoy. And if you haven't read the last chapter of RLH yet (where he meets Lila and confronts Rory) I would suggest reading that first so as not to spoil anything.**

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"Mom?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm pregnant." Rory watched as Lorelai's face dropped. There was silence. For possibly the first time ever, Lorelai Gilmore had been rendered silent.

"Mom?" Rory prodded.

"What? Who? How?..." Lorelai stuttered.

"I know it's been 33 years since you were pregnant, but I'm pretty sure you remember the 'how.' And you can probably figure out the 'who' pretty easily too."

"Don't be cute with me, Rory." Lorelai took a long dreg of champagne from her glass. "You don't just get to drop this bomb on me—on my wedding day no less—and then be all snarky. I thought you broke it off with him."

"I did. But then he showed up in Stars Hollow," Rory admitted. "It was just one night. It was supposed to be goodbye. It was supposed to be closure."

"Closure?" Lorelai scoffed. "Well I've got news for you kid. This is pretty much the opposite of closure. He'll be in your life forever now. Even if you decide not to have this baby…"

Rory cut her off. "I'm having this baby." She gently touched her stomach. She didn't know much these days, but she knew that. She was a little surprised with herself, to be honest. She'd thought of having kids someday. But it had always been hollow. Something she envisioned for her future because it's what she was supposed to want. But she'd never really longed for motherhood. And she definitely hadn't pictured being a single mother. But there was a life inside her now. A life conceived of the love between her and Logan. A product of the perfect night. And she couldn't bring herself to terminate that. Abortion would be the logical choice, and she had always been staunchly pro-choice. She was still staunchly pro-choice. But her choice was not a question. She'd contemplated it briefly, but she knew she could never give this baby up. She'd already given Logan up. Having an abortion would be like giving him up all over again.

"Well then, get prepared for the shit storm," Lorelai replied with a derisive laugh. "You think the Huntzbergers are going to take this lying down? They are the media, Rory. They frame the story. You'll be the villain. The homewrecker. There will be paternity tests and lawyers. And if you're lucky, it will end with a transatlantic custody agreement and your kid contractually bound to becoming the next generation's newspaper overlord."

"No, it won't," Rory told her calmly. She'd thought a lot about this, and she had come to only one conclusion.

"Really? And how do you plan on making that happen?"

"By not telling him." Rory's voice was clam and sure, but her eyes darted away from Lorelai's—the only barely-there-indication that she had any misgivings about her decision.

For the second time in a matter of minutes Lorelai was stunned into silence.

"It's the only way," Rory insisted. "I spoke to Dad…"

"I'm sorry," Lorelai held up a hand to stop her. "I think I'm having a stroke. Because it sounded like you just said you spoke to your Dad. But I know that can't be true because the day you tell your father anything before you tell me is the day hell places an order for 10 billion snow sleds."

"I didn't tell him I was pregnant," Rory clarified. "I made it out like it was about the book. I asked him how he felt about you raising me alone. He said it was exactly what was supposed to happen."

"Sure, easy for him to say when he wasn't the one living in a toolshed and raising a kid alone at 16."

"So you don't agree? You aren't happy with the way things turned out?"

"I raised you alone because I had to, Kid. Not because I kept you some dirty little secret from your father. And yeah, you were my world, and I don't regret a thing. But there's no such thing as meant to be. Your father made a choice. And maybe if you'd had a steady father figure around, we wouldn't be here right now—with you so scared to love somebody that you'd keep their own child a secret from them."

"That's not what I'm doing," Rory insisted, ignoring the twisting feeling in her stomach.

"Oh really? So, there's no part of you that worries that if Logan finds out you're having his child, he'll dump the heiress and come running back to you?"

"Of course that scares me," Rory cried out, throwing her arms up in the air. "I don't want to raise my child in that life, just like you didn't want to raise me that way. And I don't want to come between Logan and his family and everything he's worked so hard to achieve. This is the only way we both get what we want."

"Your baby deserves a father. And I'm far from the biggest Logan fan, especially right now, but he deserves a chance to choose whether or not to be one."

"My child deserves to be a kid, and not an heir. And Logan deserves a chance at a real family."

"You're making a big mistake, Kid."

"I don't think I am. And I'm not a kid. I'm twice as old as you were when you did this."

"I can't talk about this right now," Lorelai shook her head in disappointment. "I need to go get ready to get married again. This is supposed to be my happy day." She stood up hastily, champagne sloshing out of her cup. "We'll talk about this tomorrow."

Rory sighed. That had gone just about as well as she thought it would. "Fine, just…don't tell anyone," she said pleadingly to her mother's retreating back.

Lorelai stopped, turning her upper body to look at her daughter. "And have you upstage me on my wedding day?" Lorelai rolled her eyes. "Not likely."

"No, I mean-Logan." Rory whispered. "No one can know he's the father. Ever."

Lorelai took a second to compose herself, turning away from her daughter once more before speaking. "It's your secret, Rory; so if that's what you want, my lips are sealed. But you're delusional If you think you can keep this under wraps forever." And with that Lorelai stormed away.

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 **AN2: I've got a couple other missing scene ideas already, but if there's something you'd like to see, let me know, and maybe I'll add it to the list.**


	2. Nevertheless, She Persisted

**AN: So for the last couple of weeks I've found it a little hard to write sympathetically about rich, privileged, white, male, Yale alumni. Luckily for this story I seem to be getting over it. I thought I'd give you another lost scene. A little Rory POV for you guys. Hope you enjoy.**

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Rory sat hunched over the kitchen table, her head resting on her forearm. She had never been so tired in her life. She'd pulled a few all-nighters in college studying for exams, but those had nothing on this feeling. And she'd been a mother for less than 48 hours. At least she was allowed to up her intake of coffee from one cup a day to three. There was a lukewarm cup of the brew sitting right there on the table with her. All she needed was to find the energy to pick it up and bring it to her lips. Instead she continued to remain immobile.

The doorbell rang and Rory's head popped up, waiting for the ear-splitting scream from her room. It didn't come. She thanked some amorphous god she wasn't sure she believed in that Lila hadn't woken up.

She sighed, trying to find the energy to stand and go get the door. It was probably Lane. Her friend was supposed to come by with the twins and meet Lila, though she was a bit earlier than expected. She pushed the chair back and got up, grabbing her _Nevertheless She Persisted_ coffee mug to bring with her for the trip to the front door. When had the front door moved so far away from the kitchen?

She took a gulp of her nectar and felt its revitalizing properties as the warm liquid travelled down her throat. She closed her eyes and inhaled the lovely scent—then proceeded to trip over her own feet, coffee sloshing out of the cup and onto her Yale T-shirt.

"Crap!" She looked around and saw a semi-clean burping cloth that she had left on the sofa and, picking it up, she started dabbing at the stain. She wasn't sure why she bothered since the shirt was already a mess. She set the cup down and walked the rest of the way to the door, opening it without really looking, still preoccupied by the stain on her shirt.

"My, what a vision of loveliness," a droll voice remarked.

Rory looked up, wide eyes, hand on boob as she was still rubbing at the coffee splotch. "Colin!" she yelped, quickly pulling her hand away. Colin was here. At her house. Which meant he knew. Who else had Logan told? Should she be expecting a parade of Life and Death Brigade Members coming by the house to yell at her?

"It is I," he replied. They stood in the doorway, staring at each other. "You going to invite me in?" Colin finally asked.

"Why? Are you a vampire?" she asked, stepping aside to allow him entry.

"Huh?" he asked, making his way into the home.

"Guess not." She shook her head. She couldn't be worried about everyone else right now. Right now she just needed to muster up enough energy to make it through this. Colin loved Logan like a brother. She was sure he wasn't just here to congratulate her.

"How…cozy," Colin commented, taking in the small home.

Rory crossed her arms over her chest self-consciously. Her home must seem as tiny as a dorm room to Colin. Not to mention what a mess it was. And then there was her. Her shirt was wet and stained, she wasn't wearing a bra, she hadn't showered in three days, she had an adult diaper on, and she was fairly certain there was spit-up in her hair.

"Is there something I can do for you, Colin?" Rory bit out, as she collapsed onto the sofa.

"Well, I wouldn't say 'no' to a glass of whiskey. I mean, it is traditional to offer your guests a beverage."

"It's also traditional for guests to be invited," she snarked defensively.

"Touché," Colin agreed.

Rory sighed, not having the energy to get up from her spot. "There's beer and water in the fridge, you can help yourself. I'd stay away from anything in a baby bottle unless you're jonesing for some breast milk."

"Nah, breast milk is only worth it when it's straight from the breast."

Rory shuddered at the imagery. "Gross, Colin."

Colin disappeared into the next room and came back out with a bottle of Poland Spring. He appraised the living room once more, with that judgmental look he had perfected, before pulling up a semi-clean chair to face Rory. He removed a couple of magazines from the seat and tossed them onto the coffee table.

"I shouldn't be here," he spoke, twisting off the cap of his water and taking a sip.

"Then why are you? Because if it's to give me a guilt trip, you'll need to get in line."

"Can't say you don't deserve it," Colin replied.

"No, you can't." Rory agreed defeatedly. She deserved every bit of hate and anger people could throw at her. She really had convinced herself that she was doing the right thing by not telling Logan, but the second she had found out he was there in the very hospital she had just had his child in, she knew how badly she had screwed up.

Maybe it was just the massive flood of oxytocin, but in that moment, she would have given anything to take it back. To go back in time and make that phone call…or write a letter. A letter would have been better. She could always express herself best on a page. But she couldn't go back. Her choices were irreversible and because of them, Logan would never be able to forgive her. She had ruined any chance she'd had at having a real family. Not that traditional nuclear families were the only ones that were "real". But Logan was it for her. The only man she had ever truly loved, hated her. And she deserved every last drop of that hate. So, honestly, nothing Colin could say could make her feel any worse than she already did.

"Look, ethically speaking, this is the kind of thing the BAR frowns upon, but I'm not just Logan's lawyer, I'm his best friend. So if you could keep this little tête-a-tête between you and me, I'd appreciate it."

"Logan doesn't know you're here?"

"No, but that shouldn't be a problem; we both know how well you can keep a secret from him."

Rory glared, pulling her phone out of her pocket and pretending to type something in. "New…York…State…BAR…Assoc.." she said and she randomly hit keys.

"Okay, okay," Colin acquiesced, holding his hands up in surrender. "That was out of line."

Rory put the phone away. "If you could get to the point sometime before Lila wakes up, that'd be great."

"Do you love him?" Colin asked, following her directive.

Rory swallowed down the tears she felt building up. "Yes," she admitted. "I've tried not to. So many times I've tried to stop, but I can't."

"Neither can he."

"I'm not so sure about that anymore."

"I am," Colin replied crossing his ankle over his knee and leaning back in the chair. "Even now, even when he hates you, he still loves you. I never thought he would love anyone as much as he loves you, but I was wrong."

The tears were winning now. She couldn't hold them back. It was everything she never wanted to hear. The thing she had gone to extraordinary lengths to avoid. Hearing that he loved Odette more than he loved her. Finding out that she wasn't the one he wanted most of all.

"The way he loves that little girl of yours…" Colin continued.

Rory's head shot up as she furiously wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Lila?"

"No, Queen of the Sloths," Colin snarked.

"Queen…what?"

"Your horse," he attempted to clarify, but Rory was as lost as ever. Colin sighed. "Never mind; yes, Lila," he admitted with a roll of his eyes.

"He's so good with her," she choked out. He had taken to her immediately. There was no site more beautiful than Logan rocking their daughter to sleep on his lap. And as angry as he was at her, he never, for a second, blamed any of it on their daughter. Yes, he loved Lila. Of that she was sure.

"Why'd you do it, Rory?" Colin asked, uncrossing his legs and leaning forward in anticipation.

Should she give him the reasons she gave everyone else? The reasons she'd told herself over and over again until she actually believed them? Or should she tell him the real reason? The one she'd tried to bury so far down she'd never have to deal with it?

"I was afraid," she admitted.

"You were selfish."

"Excuse me?"

"You protected yourself first. Before Logan, before your daughter."

"I think you should leave now…" Rory growled.

"No," Colin shook his head calmly, relaxing back into the chair again. "I'm not done. You're selfish, Rory. You always have been. Don't get me wrong. I consider you a friend. I care about you. But you're not as perfect as everyone always made you out to be. You'd never have fit so well into our group if you were. We're all a little screwed up. I mean, I'm privileged and judgmental, Finn is the poster child for Peter Pan Syndrome, and I _think_ Robert just has narcissistic personality disorder, but I'm not entirely convinced he's not an actual sociopath."

Rory shrugged at the descriptions. It was true, they were all a little (or more than a little) screwed up. But it was also true that despite everything, she did still care about all of them. "And what's wrong with Logan?" she asked, playing along.

"Logan…Logan has abandonment issues."

"Logan wasn't abandoned," Rory reminded him. "His family may be screwed up, but his parents are together and in his life."

"I'm not talking about his parents, I'm talking about you." Colin clarified

"I _never_ abandoned him. He's the one who walked away. He's the one who said all or nothing. And he's the one who chose Odette."

"I tend to agree with you on the first part—though you'll never convince Logan of it. He will always believe you were rejecting him and not just his proposal. But you're lying to yourself if you think he chose Odette over you. He never chose at all. This time, it was you who did the walking."

"He asked her to marry him—while seeing me. He asked her to move in with him—while seeing me. If that's not choosing, I don't know what is."

"You're an idiot." Colin shook his head. "He wasn't choosing her, he was waiting for you to tell him not to. Every time he took a step forward with Odette, I could practically see him holding his breath, waiting for you to stop him. For you to say 'don't marry her, marry me.' But you never did."

"I was supposed to tell him not to marry her? What? Was I supposed to throw myself at his feet and beg? I'm not that kind of girl, Colin."

"No, you're not," he agreed. You don't need a man. You don't need anyone. And that's exactly what Logan was afraid of. That you'd never need him like he needed you. That you'd pick your wide-open future again. And that he'd be left all alone...again."

"So it's all my fault, huh? Everything that's wrong in his life is because of me?"

"No," Colin shook his head. "He made a ton of mistakes too. And I told him that, just like I'm telling you. But right now, it doesn't matter who screwed up more. What matters is, how do we fix it."

" _We_ don't fix anything, Colin. I appreciate that you're looking out for us…in your own screwed up way. But you can't fix our relationship. I don't know if it can be fixed, but if there's any hope, that's between Logan and me.

"I'm not talking about your fucked-up relationship. Though I do think you both need to get over yourselves and work it out. I'm talking about Logan."

"Logan doesn't need to be fixed."

"No? Then I guess that panic attack last night was totally normal."

"What?" Rory sat up at attention, feeling suddenly panicked herself. "No! Logan doesn't panic. Logan doesn't know how to panic. Logan could be lost in the woods being chased by a grizzly and he'd calmly smooth talk the bear into giving him directions."

"24 hours ago, I would have agreed with you. But a lot has changed since then."

"I know I've put him in a bad situation with..." She still couldn't bring herself to say the name, even if it was over now, "…her," she managed to grind out. "And it won't be easy telling his family, but…"

"You don't get it, Rory. Have you listened to anything I just said? This isn't about Odette, or his parents. The only thing that could fuck him up like this, is a Gilmore girl—or two."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means he's terrified of losing her. Just like he was terrified of losing you. The mere suggestion that you might try to keep him from her had him falling apart at the seams."

"I wouldn't!" She insisted. "I won't. Yeah, I thought it would be better for both of us if he didn't know, but he does…" At that moment a high-pitched cry reverberated from the baby monitor.

"Ahh, my niece is awake. Girl's got a set of lungs on her."

"Niece?" Rory asked, standing up.

"That's right. I am Uncle Colin and if you fight me on it, I will find a way to make it legally binding."

"I don't have the energy to fight you, Colin. I barely have the energy to make it to the bedroom."

"I'll get her," he offered, standing up and following her towards the bedroom door.

"Do you even know how to hold a baby?"

"No," Colin shrugged.

Rory gritted her teeth anxiously as she continued towards the bedroom. "Sit" she told him, entering the room and pointing to a rocking chair. She gently scooped up her crying daughter, feeling her diaper. It felt heavy. She tugged at the waist band in the back, sticking her nose up to it. Number one and two.

She glanced at Colin who was wrinkling his nose in disgust. "Don't suppose you want the honor of changing her…Uncle?" she asked.

"I'm more the spoil her with gifts type of uncle, and less of the dirty diaper changing kind."

"Big surprise." She laid Lila down on the changing table and went about cleaning her daughter up. Once the new diaper was securely in place, she brought Lila over to the bed and sat down. "She needs to eat," Rory announced looking straight at Colin.

"Go ahead," he replied.

Rory started at him for a moment, wondering if he realized what she was about to do. 48 hours ago she would have been mortified at the mere thought of breastfeeding in front of anyone. She'd even kicked Logan out of the room. But it was amazing how quickly her modesty had gone out the window. Since then, she'd not only fed in front of Logan multiple times, she'd fed in front of her grandmother, her father, several hospital employees, Pat the postman, and Kirk.

"Okay," she acquiesced, pulling up her shirt on the side farthest from Colin and bringing Lila up to her breast to latch on.

Colin, to his credit, seemed to take things in stride. "I'm impressed," she told him, surprised at the lack of inappropriate sexual comments.

"What? I'm a modern man. Go breastfeeding," He held his first up in a show of support. "Breast is best…" At that he did giggle. "Yep, definitely pro breast."

Rory rolled her eyes. "All out of your system now?"

"Yeah," Colin agreed. "Now where were we? Oh yes…Logan's not so irrational fear that you might try to keep Lila from him…"

"I won't!" she insisted again.

"I know that, but you can see where the fear is coming from, right? After all we discussed. You've disappeared on him before. And keeping this from him…"

Rory squirmed uncomfortably, not sure what to say. She knew her secrets had hurt Logan, had probably ruined any chance she might have had and having a real relationship with him. But the way Colin was talking…it was like he wasn't just hurt, he was broken. How could she have had the power to break him like that?

"I've told him a hundred times that if he wants to be in her life, I won't keep her from him. I don't know what else I can do to convince him."

"Having something in writing will help. We decided last night that mediation is best—you agree?" he asked for confirmation.

"Yes! Of course," she exclaimed. "I don't want a lawsuit. I don't want to fight."

"Good. Do you have a lawyer?"

Rory shook her head.

"Talk to your crazy friend, Paris. She got a top-notch legal team in that company of hers. I'm sure she can hook you up with someone great."

"That won't spook him? Me getting a great lawyer? I mean, do I really need one? I told you, I don't want to restrict his access to her. He can see her whenever he wants."

"It's not as simple as that," Colin explained. "Agreeing to co-parent is only the beginning. He understands that. He knows you need a lawyer."

Lila finished feeding and Rory fixed her shirt. She held Lila up against her chest, her chin resting on her shoulder as she patted her back a few times to burp her.

"I don't know how to make this right," she admitted.

"You might not be able to. All I can say is, whatever he needs to feel secure, especially when he can't be there…phone calls, pictures, videos…you've got to give it to him. He can't feel like you're holding back."

"I won't," she promised, looking lovingly at her daughter. She owed this to Logan, but she also owed it to Lila. She owed her a good relationship with her father. Rory stood up and started walking towards Colin.

"What are you doing?" he asked skeptically.

"Letting you hold your niece," she smiled.

Colin suddenly looked very nervous. "Umm, are you sure about this?"

"What? A few minutes ago you were offering to get her all by yourself…" she reminded him.

"Yeah, because I knew you would never let me."

Rory laughed. "Relax," she said, laying the baby in his lap. "Make sure you support her neck."

Colin took her reluctantly, his eyes wide and his body tense. Rory stepped away and he looked down at the infant who was making funny faces as she squirmed a little in his arms. His grimace slowly gave way to a smile and he felt himself relaxing back into the chair.

"This one is a charmer, Gilmore," he said, unable to take his eyes off the baby in his arms. "Just like her Mom."


	3. Breathe

**AN: The first half of this is Paris' POV and the second half is Rory's. This scene has been on my list to write for a long time so I'm glad I finally did. Hope you enjoy.**

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 _Breathe,_ Paris reminded herself and she watched Barbie and Ken slink away towards the elevators. Terrance would remind her to do her breathing exercises. She pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth and inhaled to the count of four, held it for seven, and exhaled to the count of eight. She repeated the exercise three more times, but her anger wouldn't dissipate. She wasn't surprised. All this woo-ey breathing, mindfulness, meditation crap was, well, crap.

How could Rory have kept this from her? How long had she been lying to her? She was her best friend. And her doctor! Well, okay she wasn't technically her doctor. Paris had gone straight from med school to law school, never completing an internship or residency. She had never actually wanted to be a practicing physician, sick people freaked her out. But still, she was coordinating Rory's medical care. She'd hooked her up with the best doctors money could buy, despite the fact that Rory didn't have any money. Maybe she could get Huntzberger to foot the medical bills.

Every bone in Paris' body wanted to march into that delivery room and tell Rory off. A father's medical history could have important ramifications for the baby. Rory should have trusted her with this. But what she'd told Logan was true—stressing out a woman in labor was a bad idea. It's why she'd left for coffee in the first place. She wasn't sure why, but some people found her presence to be…grating. Rory was usually a pro a dealing with Paris and her quirks, but labor seemed to diminish her patience, so Paris had decided to give her a break. She was only 5cm dilated anyhow—just barely in active labor.

But it was time to head back now; she'd been gone too long as it was. A lot could change with a delivery in thirty minutes. Plus, she couldn't risk chancing that Huntzberger would change his mind and come barging in uninvited. Not that Paris could blame him if he did.

Paris took a couple more ineffectively calming breaths before heading through the swinging doors to the maternity ward. "How's it going?" she asked the nurse as she made her way back into the room.

"Fine. She's at six cm now, and the contractions are getting…."

The nurse was cut off by an ungodly scream. Paris turned her attention to Rory. Lorelai was holding her hand. "Breathe," the soon to be grandmother instructed. "Do you want me to get you some ice chips to throw?"

"Get…me…some…freaking…pain meds," Rory grunted.

Paris evaluated the monitors. "Everything looks good, I think we can get you an epidural," she replied. She turned back to the nurse. "Why don't you make yourself useful and see about getting the anesthesiologist in here."

The nurse glared, "I'll need to check with Dr. Butler," she informed Paris. Paris rolled her eyes. Like Dr. Butler knew better than her just because he did an obstetrics residency at the Mayo Clinic. Paris doubted the man could even find a woman's clitoris.

"Then do that," Paris barked at the woman, before turning her attention back to Rory.

The contraction seemed to be over. "You're doing great," Paris replied dryly, trying to summon up as much pep as she could, and failing miserably. "Lorelai, can I have a word?"

"Sure," Lorelai replied, looking slightly confused. She didn't stand up.

"I meant outside," Paris replied with a roll of her eyes.

"Why do you need to talk to Mom outside?" Rory asked, panic in her voice. "Is something wrong? What don't you want me to hear? Is it the baby? There's something wrong with the baby? Is she going to be alright?"

"There's nothing wrong with the baby," Paris snapped. "Quit your whining."

"Are you okay if I go?" Lorelai asked. "It's probably just a paperwork issue…Right, Paris?" Lorelai glared at Paris with a protective mother bear look that said _you damn well better agree because if you upset my baby there will be hell to pay._

"Yeah sure, whatever. It's paperwork."

Rory took a couple of deep breaths. "Fine," she nodded. "Don't be long."

"I won't be," Lorelai promised, standing up.

Paris walked out of the room with Lorelai following.

"What's going on?" Lorelai questioned once the door was closed behind them.

"Did Rory tell you anything about the father?" Paris asked, keeping her eyes trained on the older woman. Lorelai winced, just barely. Paris wasn't great at reading people, but if there had been any doubt in her mind that Lorelai knew, it was gone now.

"Umm, not much. I, uh, I don't think she knows much herself."

"Right, well, the thing is, there are a lot of genetic diseases out there. The baby could have hirsutism for all we know."

"Hirsutism?" Lorelai questioned.

"Excessive hair growth," Paris clarified.

"Umm Paris, you do realize it was just a regular guy in a Wookie costume and not an actual Wookie, right?" Lorelai asked, slightly befuddled.

"Yes, Lorelai, that was my attempt at a joke." Why didn't anyone ever get her humor?

"Oh, you really should warn people."

"The point is, without a medical history of any kind, we'll need to run a lot of tests…invasive tests…" Paris informed her.

"What? What kind of tests? And why are we just hearing about this now?"

"Well I didn't want to worry Rory…make her think her baby could be nearsighted, or asthmatic, or just genetically prone to nerd-ism. But we really should know what's going on. We'll draw some blood for a DNA test. And we'll want to do a spinal tap too."

"A what?" Lorelai screeched. "Isn't that dangerous, I mean how would you keep her still."

"She'll need to be anesthetized."

"Paris, no!" Lorelai replied firmly.

"Well, there is one other option…" Paris prodded, giving Lorelai one last chance to confess.

"It better not involve invasive surgery," Lorelai warned.

"Nope. It just involves asking the father."

"And, uh, how exactly do you suggest we go about finding him?" Lorelai asked, looking anywhere but at Paris.

"Well, you could check the third floor waiting room," Paris suggested helpfully.

"Huh?"

"Well, that is where he said he'd be."

Lorelai's eyes widened in shock, her mouth falling open. "What?" she finally breathed out.

"I know you know, Lorelai. Does anyone else know? Or is just Logan and me you guys lied to."

"How? Why? When?" Lorelai stuttered.

"About 20 minutes ago in the cafeteria. I ran into him and his perfect, petit, Parisian princess…"

"This is bad…" Lorelai stated, starting to pace. She turned back to Paris for just a moment, "also, nice alliteration."

"Thanks, it just called to me," Paris replied. "Anyhow, when I saw him, I may have _mentioned_ I was here because Rory was in labor. Maybe if someone would have let me in on the secret I would have _known_ I should keep my mouth shut."

"But how did he know it was his?"

"I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that transatlantic booty calls are fairly memorable," Paris rolled her eyes. "Add in a basic knowledge of human gestation periods and the ability to count to nine, and it's not a far leap."

"This is bad…"

"You think?"

Lorelai fidgeted uncomfortably. "How'd…How did he take it?"

"Like a man who just found out he had a secret love child."

"So…he was happy?" Lorelai asked with fake hope.

"He was pissed. He tried to bogart his way in here. I nearly had to knife hand him in the throat."

"Well, you and your Krav Maga moves could probably scare away Chuck Norris, so it makes sense Logan Huntzberger would duck and cover." Lorelai chuckled nervously.

"Very true. But I don't think he's gonna just slink back to Merry Old England and forget this ever happened."

Lorelai stopped her pacing and glanced back at the door to the delivery suite. "How are we going to tell her?"

"I don't know," Paris answered.

"I think it should come from me," Lorelai said.

"That works for me," Paris replied. It was taking all her energy not to burst back in that room and give her friend a severe tongue lashing as it was. If she got started, there was no telling what words would come out of her mouth. Restraint was never one of Paris' strong points.

"But we should wait, right?" Lorelai asked uncertainly. "I mean, until after the shoving of the human being from her uterus."

Paris rolled her eyes. "Yes, we should wait, but we're going to have to rip the band aid off soon. He's waiting and he's going to expect to meet his daughter before he leaves this building. He actually seemed…"

"What?" Lorelai asked anxiously.

"God help me for admitting this, but…he seemed…like a man about to have a baby." Paris hated to say anything nice about anybody, especially Logan Huntzberger. But she'd actually gotten the sense that for once in his life, Logan cared about something other than himself. She'd been a little impressed.

"Oh god!" Lorelai suddenly exclaimed.

"What?"

"His fiancée! You said she was there."

"Oh, right."

"And she heard the part about another woman having his baby?"

"Yeah, she got the news bulletin."

"How'd _that_ go?" Lorelai asked.

"Hard to say," Paris admitted. "She was pretty stoic. Outwardly she seemed pretty 'stand by your man,' but…"

"But what?" Lorelai asked anxiously.

"The girl had…backbone." Paris admitted unexpectedly. She'd read about her, of course. The engagement had been big news in society. And she knew she was actively involved in her father's company—but she still somehow expected a vain, simpering, porcelain doll who just wanted to shop and marry rich. The woman she'd met had shown a strength and astuteness that had taken Paris by surprise. Perhaps it shouldn't have. The only thing about Logan that Paris had ever really respected was that he had fallen for Rory. He wasn't looking for some girl to feed his ego; he was attracted to women who were smart, strong-willed and ambitious. It seemed his new fiancée fit the bill.

"You don't think he's going to expect to bring her to…you know…meet Lila," Lorelai whispered as though she was afraid saying the words out loud would make them come to pass.

"Now that would be awkward," Paris replied, almost gleefully. She was still pretty pissed at Rory for hiding this; was it so wrong for her to take a little pleasure at the thought of seeing her squirm? She didn't _really_ want it to happen.

"Paris," Lorelai scolded.

Paris came back down to reality. "Listen," she said astutely. "Would you want to walk into a room with your fiancé, his mistress, and their newborn love child?"

Lorelai visibly shuddered. "No."

"Yeah, me either. So, I wouldn't work yourself up worrying about that. Besides, he doesn't have any actual rights yet. Rory gets to say who comes into that room and who doesn't."

"You're right," Lorelai said with a somewhat relieved sigh. There was silence for a moment before an ear-splitting cry could be heard coming from the delivery room. "I guess that's our cue to go back in," Lorelai pointed towards the door with a shudder. "I sure hope that anesthesiologist gets here soon or my hearing will never recover."

* * *

"Breathe," Lorelai instructed her daughter. "You can do this."

"I don't…think…I can," Rory sobbed. She was so exhausted and every muscle in her body that wasn't numb, ached. And even with the epidural, the pressure down below was unbearable.

"Oh stop being such a friggin' wuss," Paris bellowed. "Who's the bigger baby here, you or that kid you're pushing out of your vagina?"

Rory sent and icy glare Paris' way, but it only lasted a split second before another contraction had her squeezing all the circulation out of Lorelai's fingers.

"She doesn't need to be here," Dr. Butler reminded Rory. "She's not an official part of the medical team."

Rory didn't know what to say. Paris was…Paris. But she had decided at some point that she wanted her there—right? Though for the life of her she was too exhausted to remember why.

"You need me, Rory. You're almost there but you're flagging and no one can motivate you the way I can. Operation Finish Line?" she reminded her friend. "Let's push this baby out!" Paris argued. Rory's whole body clenched tightly as she pushed again.

Oh yeah, that was why. As annoying as Paris was, she actually had the ability to push her in just the right way to get her where she needed to go. "She…can…stay," Rory ground out.

"You're the boss," Dr. Butler replied with an exasperated eye roll. "but don't blame me if this baby hears her haranguing and immediately tries to climb back inside."

Rory saw Paris give him a withering stare, but then the feisty blonde turned her attention back to the woman in the hospital bed.

"I can see her head," Paris told her. "Don't stop now. I had both the twins out in less time than this."

Rory summoned up the strength to push again.

"You're almost there, Kid," Lorelai soothed, gently stroking her hair. "I know it feels like you're doing the splits on a crate of dynamite right now, but in a few minutes it will all be over and you'll have a beautiful, baby girl that will be worth all the pain and agony. I promise."

"I can't," she cried.

"I'd say quit being a pussy, but I think given the current circumstances a pussy is a pretty damn amazing thing to be. So be a pussy!"

In all her crassness, Paris was right again. She could do this—her body was made for it and it was an amazing thing. She sat up part way for leverage and squeezed as hard as she could.

"You got this, Kid." Lorelai gripped her hand for support.

"We've got a shoulder, Gilmore. Don't quit on me now."

"Just a couple more," Dr. Butler added. "Your baby's almost here."

And he was right; after only three more pushes, a sharp cry filled the air and Rory collapsed, exhausted on her bed.

"Congratulations, Mom," Dr. Butler said, clamping and cutting the umbilical cord. He handed the baby off to the labor nurse to suction her nose and mouth.

"She's beautiful," Lorelai sniffled.

"Where is she?" Rory asked. "Where's my baby?" Her brief second of exhaustion induced calm was suddenly overtaken by panic. She needed to see her baby. To hold her. The know that she was alright.

"We're just cleaning her up," the nurse said. "She's doing great. I promise, you'll be holding her in just a second." The nurse finished cleaning and drying her, then placed a stethoscope to her chest to listen to Lila's heart. She took a couple of recordings and brought Lila over to her mother. "Her Apgar score is 8, that's great," she told the new Mom, handing the baby over. "Put her right on your belly. Skin to skin contact is important." She placed Lila gently on Rory's bare stomach and covered her with a blanket.

Rory looked down at the red, wrinkly, smooshed looking human and immediately started to cry. She had a full head of fine blonde hair, just like Logan's. She wished he could have been there with her—to hold her hand, to kiss her forehead, to see his eyes light up as he looked at his daughter for the first time. She knew without a doubt that Logan would have loved this little girl as much as she did.

But he wasn't there. It was her fault—her choice—she knew that. She'd questioned her decision so many times throughout the pregnancy, but no matter how many times she wanted to call him, she never did. It was over between them and bringing him in to this would only bring them both pain. And she didn't want her and Logan's issues to become her daughter's. Rory couldn't be what Logan needed and having him in her life halfway—well she'd seen what that kind of relationship between parents could do to a child.

Lila's legs were kicking gently over Rory's belly and small bubbles started to form at her mouth.

"There are bubbles! Why are there bubbles? Are there supposed to be bubbles? Is something wrong?" Rory panicked again.

"Chill, Drama Queen," Paris told her. "That just means she's hungry."

"Already?" Rory asked.

"Well, her name is Lorelai Gilmore," Lorelai reminded her.

"Newborns are ready to nurse almost immediately. It may take her a couple of tries to get it right though; don't worry too much about it. If she has trouble, we can give you two some help, but for now just let her do her thing," the nurse informed her.

Rory just stared in awe at her daughter. She still couldn't quite believe she'd made an actual human being. She wasn't religious, but her daughter really did seem like a miracle.

"Do you want me to go tell the others?" Lorelai asked. Rory knew Luke, her father and her grandmother were all in the waiting room. As much as she loved them all, she wasn't ready for any more people. Though on the other hand, she could only imagine how leaving those three to their own devices for too long would go.

"You can tell them," she said, "but I'm not ready for visitors yet."

"Right," Lorelai said. Rory thought she looked oddly nervous. "I'll, uh, I'll be right back, then. Paris…" she called, as she headed towards the door. "Maybe we should give them a moment of privacy."

The two women headed out towards the waiting room. Rory thought she heard some hushed whispers as the door swung shut behind them, but she paid it no mind. All she cared about at that moment was the tiny, pink, bundle in her arms.

The nurse performed the second Apgar test, then excused herself, letting Rory know she'd be back to check on them shortly.

Rory was mesmerized as Lila continued to squirm, finally making her way to her breast. The baby tried to latch on a couple times before stopping to rest again. After a few minutes she made another attempt and this time she succeed, starting to suckle. The sensation was strange, and slightly uncomfortable, and yet Rory couldn't help the huge smile that made its way onto her face. Her baby was feeding. Not only had she grown this child inside her, but now she was producing the very food the would nourish her.

She'd never felt closer to another living being as she did in that moment. The only other person she'd ever felt even remotely this connected to was Logan, the night that Lila had been conceived. She felt a swell of melancholy mingling with her joy as she thought of the one thing that could make this moment more perfect. It would have been so much easier if she didn't love him. Then it wouldn't hurt so much that he wasn't there. Then again, if truth be told, if she hadn't loved him so much, she probably would have told him, and then he would be there.

Rory heard the door open and close as Lorelai made her way back in.

"How you doing, Kid?" her mother asked.

Rory sniffled. "Great."

"That was convincing." Lorelai laughed.

"She's just so…perfect."

"Yeah," the reigning Lorelai replied. "She is pretty damn perfect."

They were quiet for a moment as the both reveled in the site of the newborn. Lorelai took a seat in the chair next to her daughter.

"Rory…" she started hesitantly. Rory looked at her.

"Yeah?"

"I…uh…I don't know if this is the right time to tell you this, but…"

"What? What's wrong? Is Lila okay?"

"Lila's fine," Lorelai said. "This isn't about her."

"Oh, okay," Rory replied, confused but relieved.

"Paris ran into someone in the cafeteria earlier…"

"Who'd she piss off this time?" Rory laughed.

Lorelai paused uncomfortably and Rory straightened up at alert. She had no idea what was about to come out of her mother's mouth, but she knew it was serious the second a witty quip didn't emanate from her Lorelai's lips. "It was Logan," she finally said.

Rory thought she felt her heart stop beating. If she weren't blinking, she'd be sure she'd just died. A million different emotions were coursing through her. It was her wildest dream and her worst nightmare all rolled into one. Logan. Here.

"Logan…Marshall-Green?" she asked, still hoping there was some explanation for this.

"Logan Huntzberger." Rory just stared, mouth gaping open. "I'm not sure why he's here, but he was in the cafeteria at the same time as Paris and, well, Paris didn't know about…so she didn't realize she shouldn't. So, you know, she did...mention...that you were here too...in labor. And Logan, being, well, able to do math, he just kind of…yeah…" Lorelai trailed off, her ramble dying awkwardly.

"Logan's here?" Rory asked again, still in shock.

"Yes."

"And he knows about Lila?"

"Yes," Lorelai confirmed.

"Where is he?" She asked. Why wasn't he here? He knew, and he was nearby. Why hadn't he come to her? Was he mad? That was a ridiculous question. Of course he was mad. But how mad? Mad enough to not love her anymore? Mad enough to not care about their daughter?

"He's upstairs in the one of the waiting rooms. Paris convinced him it was better that way."

"How…how mad was he?" Rory asked, trembling.

"Rory…" Lorelai replied cautiously. She could tell her mother didn't want to tell her.

"How mad?" she repeated.

"Not as mad as me," Paris bellowed from outside the door before stomping back into the room.

"How could you, Rory?" she pointed her finger menacingly. "I thought we were friends."

"Paris!" Lorelai scolded.

"What?"

"We talked about this. This is why you were supposed to stay outside."

"I didn't yell. That was _not_ yelling," Paris argued. "That is the natural tenor of my voice."

"Paris," Lorelai said again.

"Fine," Paris sulked, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'll go, but this conversation is not over, Missy," she told Rory warningly, stomping back out of the room.

"I'm sorry about that," Lorelai said.

But Rory's eyes were wide with fear. She'd lied to everyone, not just Paris. They were all going to know she lied to them. Everyone was going to be so mad at her. And Logan. Logan would hate her forever for this. "Does anyone else know yet?" she asked, her lip quivering in fear.

"No. But the news is going to get out, you know."

Rory nodded.

After a moment of silence, Lorelai spoke. "He's expecting to see his daughter."

"He's gonna hate me."

"There's a pretty good chance," Lorelai said her words true but sympathetic.

"He's going to yell."

"I would."

Rory's eyes widened again. "He's going to yell in front of Lila."

"No." Lorelai shook her head. "I won't let that happen. He's going to yell, he kind of has a right to, Kid. But I can take Lila outside while he says his piece.

"Oh god," Rory moaned. "What have I done?" What was she thinking for the last nine months? How did she ever think she'd be able to keep this secret? Why did she ever think it was a good idea to try? She'd had so many reasons. She'd had a pro-con list. And yet, right now, they were all failing her. Even the excuses she could remember seemed flimsier than rice paper. Logan knew, and she had screwed it all up.

She should have told him. Called him, sent him a letter, smoke signaled, something. Maybe they would have had a chance then. But not now. Now he would be in her life forever, but he would hate her. How was she supposed to live with him hating her?

Lorelai stroked her hair consolingly. "You made a bad choice and it backfired. But we'll get through this."

Rory mimicked the move, caressing her own daughter's head for comfort.

"What do I do, Mommy?" she pleaded, as soft and fragile as though she herself were a child.

"Well, I've been thinking about the best way to do this…" Lorelai informed her. "We want minimal interference. I think we should get your Grandma in here to see the baby. She's overdue for her afternoon nap, so once she's had a chance to meet Lila, we can convince her to go back to the hotel. Put that bombshell off until later."

Rory nodded in agreement. Her grandmother would not take any of this well, and the woman was punishingly cruel when bated.

"Then we'll have to tell your Dad and Luke so they understand what Logan's doing here. Then we'll clear the room and I'll go get him."

Rory felt her breath hitch in her chest. She was going to see Logan again. She was terrified, but if she was being honest, a part of her was also giddy. It was like Lorelai had said about Lila; all the pain and agony would be worth it for one look at his face. She nodded her head in agreement with Lorelai's plan, pushing back the tears welling in her eyes.

Lorelai took Rory's right hand in her left, her other arm reaching out to stroke her granddaughter. "You got this," she assured her daughter. "It'll all be okay. Just breathe."

* * *

 **AN: I just love writing Paris. She's so much fun. What did you guys think? Was she unnecessarily mean to Lorelai, making her think Lila would need all those tests? Or did she deserve it? And what about Rory? Is she properly contrite? Are you still mad at her for lying, or are you starting to feel for her a bit more? I'd love any feedback you've got. Thanks for reading.**


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